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Most parents are familiar with the different parenting styles and several parents give their time and, effort to understand how their parenting styles shape their children's outcomes to make adjustments that will be supportive of their children's development. Additionally, as parents many of us are familiar with developmental milestones and get worried when our children appear slow or delayed in achieving a particular milestone. This is because such delays leave certain gaps that impact their overall functioning.
Similarly, as parents, when we don't know about or miss any milestone in the development of our roles as parents, significant gaps abound that impact our parenting outcomes and how our children turn out. What are the seven parenting milestones that you should be aware of?
The Seven Milestones of Parenting
Purpose discovery
Becoming & abiding
Leadership
Stewardship & responsibility
Mentorship
Release
Accountability
We see these milestones in the life of the Master-Parent Jesus as he gives a full accounting of His parenting over the disciples through the entire chapter of John chapter 17.
"During My time here, I protected them by the power of the name you gave me. I guarded them so that not one was lost, except the one headed for destruction, as the scripture foretold" John 17:12
Understanding Purpose
Beginning from Adam to Christ, we find that man's existence is about purpose, God's purpose. We see this in the book of beginnings - genesis. From Genesis, we find that the "that it may" always followed every of God's statement of "Let there be". Everything that God created, He created with an intended purpose; including man, the institution of marriage and the type of outcomes He desired from that union.
We are all created with specific purposes in the mind of our Creator, first as individuals, then as couples and as parents. Revelations 4:11, Ephesians 2:10, Malachi 2:15a.
Every man, and indeed the women that would walk with them (as helpmeets/wife), must find the purpose for which they were born, the giftings that God has equipped them with towards accomplishing that purpose and commit to a life that is given to daily refining that talent to birth the skillful precision that yields impact.
When purpose is not known, understood and pursued as the only course our lives must follow, we live the life of the mediocre. Profiting nothing and no one. Our great is crucified on the cross of the many just "good enough" we pursue.
"In a large house there are articles not only of gold and silver, but also of wood and clay; some are for special purposes and some for common use. Those who cleanse themselves from the latter will be instruments for special purposes, made holy, useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work".
2 Timothy 2:20-21 NIV
The scripture above captures aptly, what happens when we don't seek to understand the purpose for our existence, understand our innate strengths and giftings, and know the many dimensions God would have us deploy them for His glory including, what God has called us to be to our spouses and children.
The story of salvation, is the story of purpose; God's purpose for the earth wired through the restored man (the Christus). Our purpose in life is to discover the intersections on God's eternal purpose that our lives close up. We are overseers, stewards and managers of God's eternal purpose for the earth; one generation to the next. Beginning with our lives, the people that God will have us serve, support or mentor. Our roles will change over time but the centrality of who we are must be stabilized on the foundation of His purpose for our lives.
Discovering Purpose
To discover the "why" of our existence, we first must know who we are. Your purpose as an individual is embed in your identity. As God's children, our identity is derived from God's word, who God says we are. God created us and His word is the only valid testimony of our identity.
Ephesians 2:10 says "We are God's workmanship created in Christ to do good works which God purposed from time".
We are children born of God in Christ and called to abide in Him. We are His workmanship created for good works in our homes, community/work and the church. We have been called to a life of productivity. Our purpose is to do good works in Christ in whatever field God has planted us.
God's desire is that we produce fruits that endure; the fruits of our bodies must endure in God. We are here to represent God to our world, giving essence as salt of the earth and shinning His righteousness as light. For clarity, we will distinguish between general and specific purpose.
General purpose as having to do with direct works for kingdom manifestation and growth; preach the word, heal the sick, deliver the oppressed and set the captives free. This is the purpose for which every person that is born again in Christ is called, re-created.
Specific purposes as touching governmental exchanges either in the physical or spiritual. This is our expressed calling that we have been crafted and gifted to manifest in ways that strategically manifest God and His kingdom. Daniel in the bible, was an administrator, a government functionary. Aquilla and Priscilla were entrepreneurs strategically placed to minister to their industry. Likewise today, God has given us certain gifts and placed us in different strategic positions from home makers to board executives in big corporate organizations to bring change to our world as the salt of the earth.
Purpose for us as Christians is to spread the knowledge of God on the earth and be kingdom influencers in the places God has put us.
"The LORD has given to Bezalel, Oholiab, and others the skills needed for building a place of worship, and they will follow the LORD's instructions". Exodus 36:1
Remember, your gifts, position and placement in life is specific "purpose" and God has placed you there for "good works" that glorify Him.